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Janus January
There are times that when not everything you do, everything you say, sinks in with those around you. Worse yet is when your admission should be looked on as positive and is then rebuked. To top that off, you describe what you are doing in a frank way and it is rebuffed even though you KNOW the other person engaged in similar activity and should understand.
Maybe it is the double standard that is getting to me, it is ok for you to do something, but when I want to do it you regard it as a slight or something, and decide to toss away the investment in time we had, ending a friendship. So be it.
It must be the New Year and people that I thought were my friends and very special to me are now severing ties with me for various reasons. I hate loosing friends, but I hate loosing friends for what I see as trivial or petty reasons. The thing is, and I can only hope this is the case (or fear that it is the case), that I am not in on all the facts. In which case if I do not have all the facts, maybe it is something I have done (or haven’t) and I am alienating people without knowing it.
I guess you can call it my New Years Resolution, and that was I promised to be more open and honest with those around me (hence the last posts). Maybe people cannot handle the honesty. Maybe they are leaving because they are hiding something. Maybe, maybe, maybe… who the hell knows anymore.
So, here it is, my list of friends is in the self-cleaning mode.
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